Monday, October 24, 2005

Oct. 24

Suppose i realized it was time to do something about what i had on this site. Just looking at this website and glancing at my previous entries while i was deleting them one by one was a reminder of alot of bad things. I am so glad to be home and completely terrified of getting called back up to "do my duty" or more of my duty I guess. Seeing video's and stories from Iraq keep a dark spot in my heart encased in glass with break in case of recall written on it. I dont want to have to live like that ever again, pretending to be eager to kill as if it was justified in that foriegn land and that automatically it was morally okay because one man half a world away expalained it to be. Im still sickened by protesters, i havent joined that side. I was walking down the street one afternoon minding my own business when i was approached by a man asking me to "join the fight!" i told him i already did enough fighting and i was glad just to be home. he told me i fought on the wrong side basically and that his side was "better", reminded me of arguments on a playground. I smiled and went about my day, just being glad to have shorts and a t-shirt on and a ballcap on to keep the beautiful southern california sun out of my eyes.
Im up for a move to a much cooler climate here soon so my next posting, which will be long from now will probaly be from a much differnt perspective. I find it amazing the way the brain can be altered so much through just surroundings and influence. Snow covered, cold ass Michigan, Im on my way. Surfboards included.